026. Missing [Voice Post]
Aug. 6th, 2008 12:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
invisible_aiSeven days. Seven days are missing from my memory... Why? It is because I was dead? Though I still find that highly unusual after what Thomas was able to inform me about the afterlife.
It has been difficult for me to relax, knowing this much. The backdated entries have only been able to inform me of so much, including my most... unnatural behavior. I... was not aware that I was able to record anything after my life was taken.What else am I not aware of? If I am ever conscious of myself more clearly in the next life, then I will try to exercise more caution. Not that I would wish to experience such a fate again. Both for my sake, and that of my partner.
Thankfully, it seems that my death was not an act of murdering solely in cold blood. It was premeditated. I am able to understand this much now, as well as the intentions of Walter Sullivan. A mother... Such a simplistic goal. But I wonder what purpose he would have in removing the heart from my body? (If my past words are to be believed.) Although he is currently in captivity, has no one found out where these organs have been stored? I do not know if there would be any gain in finding them, but what would be the purpose of him going to the trouble of obtaining them if not for some future purpose?
It also seems that I have misplaced my boots. A shame. But I believe that I heard them walking around in the building, if the sound of those footsteps outside of the apartment are any indication.
If I ever wish to make any progress, then I will have to search Horton again.
I am aware of your situation now, thanks to your friends. It is regrettable to see you this way... That your memories have been replaced with that of a murderer.
As your guardian, I will not allow your nature to be suppressed in this way. Your drive to help others and your cheerfulness should not be limited, even though I have no intention of concerning myself over the ones who have been already hurt by your actions. Paula, Poo and yourself are my only concern.
I am requesting a meeting, Ness. If you are not able to agree to this, then I shall try to find you myself.
---
It appears that I am not the only one who is missing the memories experienced during that time frame. Sai has also been affected.
Would it be because of his cells? Or is it an effect of the strain brought on my the stress he experienced following my death? ...It is like a temporary amnesia, except I feel that his memories will never return. [A pause] Perhaps... It is for the best.
It has been difficult for me to relax, knowing this much. The backdated entries have only been able to inform me of so much, including my most... unnatural behavior. I... was not aware that I was able to record anything after my life was taken.
Thankfully, it seems that my death was not an act of murdering solely in cold blood. It was premeditated. I am able to understand this much now, as well as the intentions of Walter Sullivan. A mother... Such a simplistic goal. But I wonder what purpose he would have in removing the heart from my body? (If my past words are to be believed.) Although he is currently in captivity, has no one found out where these organs have been stored? I do not know if there would be any gain in finding them, but what would be the purpose of him going to the trouble of obtaining them if not for some future purpose?
It also seems that I have misplaced my boots. A shame. But I believe that I heard them walking around in the building, if the sound of those footsteps outside of the apartment are any indication.
If I ever wish to make any progress, then I will have to search Horton again.
I am aware of your situation now, thanks to your friends. It is regrettable to see you this way... That your memories have been replaced with that of a murderer.
As your guardian, I will not allow your nature to be suppressed in this way. Your drive to help others and your cheerfulness should not be limited, even though I have no intention of concerning myself over the ones who have been already hurt by your actions. Paula, Poo and yourself are my only concern.
I am requesting a meeting, Ness. If you are not able to agree to this, then I shall try to find you myself.
---
It appears that I am not the only one who is missing the memories experienced during that time frame. Sai has also been affected.
Would it be because of his cells? Or is it an effect of the strain brought on my the stress he experienced following my death? ...It is like a temporary amnesia, except I feel that his memories will never return. [A pause] Perhaps... It is for the best.
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[Voice]
Date: 2008-08-06 06:49 pm (UTC)It is strange, that I have no clear memory of what happened after I died. Though it seems that I had left an entry and overheard past recordings of myself that were... very unlike me.
I do not know what to think anymore...
The writing on the wall in the third floor of Horton... Was that also my responsibility?